Why is the first step the hardest?

Decision to seek help can be very difficult. We often put things off because we believe we can handle them on our own, that the situation isn't serious enough, or that we haven't exhausted all our options. Such procrastination often increases pressure and thus exacerbates the problems. He may experience feelings of shame, fear, powerlessness, or disappointment, which are completely understandable. Experience shows that these feelings are usually significantly reduced during the first meeting with a counselor. The first step in improving the situation is to schedule an initial consultation through the website.

Although we notice that parents are becoming more aware of the guidelines for the use of digital devices in children and adolescents, they often turn to us only when the problems are already significant or an undesirable event has occurred. Parents often perceive the need for professional help as a failure in raising their children. As with a child's physical and mental health, sometimes professional help is necessary and recommended for complications in the use of digital devices, and it does not mean that the parent is not doing their job well. Moreover, a parent who does not seek help as problems accumulate causes more harm to the child, themselves, and the family.

"Visiting a professional is not a sign of defeat in parenting, but a responsible way of caring for a child and the family."

But how do you know that Logout is the right place to get help?

About Logout

We are the Center for Help with Excessive Internet Use, a non-profit organization with years of experience in counseling and prevention in the field of digital addictions. This includes addiction to video games, social media, online gambling, online sex and pornography, online shopping, cryptocurrency trading, and general internet addiction (browsing, news, email). We also address cases of problematic or excessive use, where we are not yet talking about addiction, and we take preventive action before any problems arise. Additionally, we have a program for individuals who have experienced online violence, which includes support and individual counseling. The program's goal is to allow a person to speak about their distress experienced online without fear or judgment.

As part of our activities, we provide both individual and family counseling, with the former intended for individuals 13 years and older, and the latter for the entire family, regardless of the age of the children. Our doors are open to everyone who feels that digital devices are a burden and who has difficulty managing the resulting problems on their own.

Examples of situations in which it makes sense to register for the introductory meeting:

• You are considering buying a smartphone for a child and would like advice or support,
• in your family, you experience conflicts due to device use that you don't know how to resolve,
• you want to create a family media plan, but you don't know where to start,
• you have lost touch with your child, who is withdrawing to digital devices,
• you notice signs of digital addiction in your child (e.g., skipping school, loss of interest in hobbies, poor sleep habits),
• You are concerned that the child is being subjected to online abuse or you know that it has already happened,
• at home, there are rules limiting the use of devices, but they are not effective...

   

This is just a few of the more common examples we encounter. Every family is unique, and a meeting at Logout makes sense for your family even if your situation is not among those listed, but the issue is related to digital devices or the internet.

What to expect at the introductory meeting?

• The meeting lasts 45–60 minutes. The first consultation is informative and non-binding. Its purpose is primarily to exchange information, based on which we decide together on the further form of solving your problems.
• The process is similar to an interview, where everyone present answers the questions of the counselor, who gets to know the situation of your family. This is an opportunity to discuss your experiences with a consultant and receive professional feedback.
• During the meeting, the principle of confidentiality applies, and the counselor will create a safe space for sharing struggles and perspectives on problems with their understanding approach.
• We don't usually make agreements, create a complete family plan, or take intensive measures at the introductory meeting.
• At the end of the meeting, the counselor presents options for further assistance, such as enrolling in one of our programs or referring you to another source of help.
• The Logout family counseling program involves the active participation of all family members: children and parents or guardians who are involved in the primary care of the child.
  The introductory and all subsequent meetings in Logout units are free, but you can donate 1% of your income tax to support our work.

You can read more about the counseling programs we offer at Logout here.

How to motivate a child to attend a meeting?

Parents or guardians sometimes write to us in distress that they are unable to persuade the child to attend the introductory meeting. We have gathered some tips on how to motivate a child to visit Logout.

• Honestly present the purpose of the meeting to the child. Explain where you are going, what you expect from the meeting, and why you think a visit to Logout is necessary. Tell them that the first meeting is conversational and intended to get to know the counselor and the family.
• Be empathetic to the child - tell them that you understand their fear, resistance, or nervousness about the meeting, but insist that it is the right step towards improvement.
• Express concern for the well-being of your child.Present the visit to Logout as an opportunity for him to feel better, to have more energy, fewer problems at school, etc., and to improve your understanding as a family.We advise against presenting a visit to Logout as a punishment.
• You can look at our website with your child. You can find descriptions and photos of our advisors, blog posts, and addiction tests among the tabs.
• Explain to the child that the goal of treatment at Logout is not to completely remove all digital devices, but to work towards reducing and balancing their use.
• Explain that you or the entire family system will be involved in the process of change. Commit to diligently following the tasks you will receive as parents.

Even if you try all of the above and more, the child may still resist attending. It is your parental duty to ensure your child's health and well-being, so persistence is necessary in such a case.

How do I make an appointment?

You can register for the introductory consultation via the online form. Counseling is available in Ljubljana, Kranj, Celje, Koper, and Maribor, and you can also choose remote counseling (on Zoom).

"Oh, I really don't know if this is the right choice..."

Of course, it may happen that the meeting does not go as expected. Perhaps only one meeting will be needed, where we confirm your good habits and encourage you to continue, or perhaps we will decide that we are not the right place for your problems and offer you other sources of help… It is difficult to predict the course without an attempt.

Common thoughts that make the first step difficult:

• Our problems are too small/too big for such counselling. - Based on your stories and the use of psychodiagnostic tools, our counselors will assess the severity of your concerns.
• We have had bad experiences with counseling/psychotherapy/treatment, it will be the same again. - Each experience is unique, so your past experiences do not define the new ones that await you.
• We don’t deserve help because we don’t have order at home. - Consistency and persistence are two goals we work on throughout the meetings. Sometimes, they become more accessible through conversation and finding new strategies with a counselor.
• I'm ashamed of our domestic situation. - Shame is one of the most common emotions that arise when seeking help. Our advisors will support and encourage you to improve the situation.
• They certainly don’t have experience with such a case. - Logout's professional work is the result of years of experience, education, and knowledge sharing among colleagues, participation in intervisions, supervisions, and dealing with a wide range of situations. Like any expert, we learn something new with each case.

If you notice that digital technologies are having a negative impact on your family's daily life, we recommend that you sign up for the meeting. We can promise you that our consultants will do their best to make the initial consultation as meaningful and useful as possible.

What did others say about the introductory meeting?

"We were very satisfied with the advice, responsiveness, and the advisor. Thank you for your help. I highly recommend your help to anyone who finds themselves in a similar situation as we did. You changed our lives for the better. Thank you again. You're the best👍"

"Thank you for your help, the conversation was very relaxed. The activities we did as a family after the advice were very useful for us and contributed to quality interaction within the family."

"We received very useful information about using the internet and how to behave in a world of increasingly rapid digitalization. I would recommend it to others who find themselves in a situation where they don’t know where to turn.”

"We found the initial meeting to be an unexpectedly pleasant and relaxed experience with a number of insights from all participants. Thank you!"

"After the meeting, we must implement the proposed solution. We must set rules and stick to them. My wife and I needed more or less confirmation that we were almost doing the right thing, but we weren't consistent. The conversation was pleasant. Thank you for the time and the opportunity to discuss and present our perspective on the problem."

"Our family was given the impetus by Logout's counselor to introduce positive changes regarding screen use, not just for our child, but also for my partner and me."

"We are very satisfied with the counseling. Teenagers are more likely to listen to someone who is not a parent, and the counseling helps parents learn how to use the phone in a proper way, so they can not only push but also understand and set limits correctly. I have already recommended the program to friends, colleagues..."